On Being Unique

If I had a dime for every time I heard the phrase, “‘This is unique.’, ‘This is rare.’, or even, ‘This is something I may see only once during all my years of practice!’,” I’d be rich. Well, not really, but I’d probably have about $0.70. It’s not much to bank on, but it’s there. Apparently, the whole You’ve-Got-A-Tumor-That’s-Eaten-Your-Entire-Manubrium thing isn’t seen very often. I’ve always thought doing things the same as everyone else is boring. Yippee me!

I had the CT guided biopsy with conscious sedation yesterday. That was a tad bit of a joke. There was no sedation, only consciousness. Imagine feeling the pop of a hollow needle go through your bone (or what’s left of it) and being fully awake. It was great! (Joke) Unfortunately, that stupid monster is MILLIMETERS from my aorta. The doctor performing my biopsy decided it was too much of a risk to continue the procedure, so they sent me back to recovery with instructions to head over to the Heart Hospital.

I spoke with Dr. Garrett at the Heart Hospital about why the biopsy doctor was unable to get a good sample. We discussed all the options and decided on surgery. Dr. Garrett is a cardiothoracic surgeon, so I suppose if I had to pick someone to operate that close to my aorta it would be him. There’s still that small possibility the lab will be able to get some answers with the bit of tissue we have, but I was told not to get my hopes up.

This next surgery is scheduled for Tuesday. I would be honored if you would say a quick prayer for steadiness of Dr. Garrett’s hands during the procedure. ‘Millimeters’ isn’t very much space to work with!

“Surely he will never be shaken; a righteous man will be remembered forever. He will have no fear of bad news; his heart is steadfast, trusting in the LORD. His heart is secure, he will have no fear; in the end he will look in triumph on his foes. He has scattered abroad his gifts to the poor, his righteousness endures forever; his horn will be lifted high in honor.” Psalm 112:6-9

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16 thoughts on “On Being Unique

  1. As your mother I sit back in awe at how you are handling yourself through this. Your shoulders and chin held high and usually a smile on your face. Your strength and courage amaze me. Your love of Lee, Harper and Gunnar makes me so proud of you. I do know that little girl inside you though and want to hold her very close and comfort her, as I know she is a little overwhelmed. Know that I am near if you should ever feel the need. For now I know that God has his arms wrapped very tightly around you, along with your loving family and all will be good. I love you with all my heart. Mom

  2. “May the Lord bring good to you and keep you. May the Lord make His face shine upon you and be kind to you. May the Lord show favor toward you, and give you peace.” (Numbers 6:24-26, NLV)

    I love you, Stephie

  3. Steph, thank you for being so brave and sharing your experience with everyone. I did something similar when I started my blog when I was experiencing the difficult birth and NICU process with Jackson. Let me tell you, it is so cathartic to put your thoughts in writing and know that people are embarking on your journey with you. It is also inspirational to the people who follow your story, especially when you handle it as gracefully as you are. Finally, it is a gift to your family and friends; you are literally putting a piece of yourself out there for everyone to hold on to. I am officially following you now and I look forward to updates. Even though I am so far away, I am there fighting with you in spirit. You are a beautiful soul and I know that God will protect you as you face this challenge. My thoughts and prayers are with you my friend. Love you! Steph Morrison

  4. Pretty sure I have the most amazingly brave and so very beautiful cousin in the whole wide world… The strength that you show is absolutely amazing. There is not a day that goes by that I am not thinking of you, Lee, Harper Dawn and Gunnar. My thoughts and prayers are with you always. Once again anything you need just ask. Love you so much Stephie!

    Love Kensie

  5. We are praying Steph, I’m so sorry that you had to go though all of that yesterday. Our fingers are crossed that they got enough to give you information, but if not it sounds like you will be in good hands on Tuesday. We will pray for you and Lee (to continue to have strength), Dr. Garrett (to have steadfastness) as well as for a “unique” answer to all of this. We love you!

  6. You are a tower of strength and courage. Harold and I just want to hug you. Today I am clinging to Hebrews 4:16 Let us approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in our time of need. Hugs Barbara

    P.S. sill amazed you can look so pretty in an old hospital gown, your smile gives us all hope!!

  7. Stephanie,
    Many here are praying for you, Lee, Harper and Gunnar. The following are just a few of the prayers we’ve received for you. We love you. J, T & E

    “We just don’t know what might come up for us to deal with. It is good that we know The One that is on our side.”

    “God is all-powerful. He is mighty to save. For the Lord is a great God, and a King above all gods. In His Hands are the deep places of the earth; the strength of the hills is His also. The sea is His, and He made it; and His Hands formed the dry land. Stephanie, Lee, Harper, and Gunnar are in these marvelous Hands of Christ by the power of the beautiful Holy Spirit. Good Hands, Kind Hands, Healing Hands, Protective Hands. God bless all.”

    “Thanks for sharing this great prayer need. My heart goes out to Stephanie and her family; and I am praying for God’s peace, healing, deliverance, comfort, etc. as well as for wisdom, skill, and God’s precision for the doctor in this next procedure. But Lord, You can heal her miraculously; and that is what we are also praying for. Blessings.”

    “For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.” Jer 29:11

  8. Stephanie is I Read all these wonderful comments I am so proud of you and cannot be anything but so impressed by your courage and faith let me add one more prayers to these Philippines chapter 4 :13 I can do everything through him who gives me strength . Stephanie Ed and I pray for you daily the number of people that are praying is phenomenal please know that God be with you every day love Ed and Deb

  9. Hey Steph;
    Thanks for the update. We are praying like crazy for you, Lee and the kiddos! I have great faith in you and in our Savior! I also agree with Barbara. It good to know that people can still look good in one of those hospital things.

    Kevin and Michele

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